Chemo #2 done!

Family and Friends,

I hope this email finds you all well. I'm so happy to report that I completed two full cycles of chemotherapy and I have only two more to go. I'm still no authority on chemotherapy and certainly every protocol or mix of types of chemotherapies are different for everyone but here is what I've experienced over the past couple of week since I wrote you last.

In general the first two weeks following the first chemotherapy I didn't feel well most days. It was better week two than week one but as my friends at MSU would say - not enough to be statistically significant. Day 18 post chemotherapy #1 my hair was falling out. It was due for a wash and I remember all the stories of others losing it in the shower - trust me to say that is true. Every time I put my head in the water the drain plug. Actually it was gross to see hair falling out in chunks. What was left I blew dry and blastered it with hair spray. I went into work and a few people commented gently - luckily for me hair loss is normal at Cancer Care Associates (CCA) so there was no look of shock. I called to make an appointment at Susan's to have my head shaved and the wig fitted. I didn't cry. I just felt sad. The wig to me looked like a helmet and felt big. Next day I went back to Susan's and they spent two hours working on the wig to get the head piece to fit. Two days later I went to my usual hair dresser and she tried to get the wig to look more like my old hair. Not an easy task. Basically, I'll say I spent six hours on my wig. I don't care for it and I'll probably go back to try again - but likely it's as good as it gets. Whenever I'm out in public I wear a wig but whenever I'm home I don't. Only one more thing about hair - taking a shower is much more efficient without it!

How do I feel? Week three is really very normal. I have to say I was productive, my brain worked like my ol' self and I felt good. I had trouble with constipation week one and two, so week three I wrote an article for our CCA Newsletter for the patients on constipation (always trying to write about things I know best). I exercised most every day, certainly not as much as normal but yet I could get downstairs to our exercise room at 5:30am and get into my little zone.

The day before chemotherapy I had my pre-chemotherapy appointment with Cyndi Kresge David's Physician Assistant at the office. Basically my blood count that shot up to 60,000 wbc's about 10 days ago appear's now to have been a reaction to the Neulasta. All else for the pre-vist was okay - no changes in blood pressure, etc but my weight was up two pounds. Cyndi re-evaluated the need for the steroids (pills) the day before the chemotherapy and decided that since I didn't have a reaction to Taxotere the first time, we could eliminate the pills. The difference would be that she would order a higher dose (20mg) of steroids to be given by infusion 30-40 minutes prior to the Taxotere. I'm still going to receive the Neulasta this Monday. If you recall from one of my emails it was Neulasta that caused the severe bone pain and when it hit my sternum I thought I was having a heart attack. I felt like I couldn't breath. It was scary and painful.

Chemotherapy day I had blood drawn in the morning and true to form, I can't seem to have normal blood results no matter what since the surgery. This time my platelets were double normal values. As Dr. Stender said, my bone marrow was just jugging the platelets out. Chemotherapy was still approved, so I was good to go. Dima was my partner for the chemotherapy. It took two needle stabs to get the vein going. First they gave me Aloxi and the steroids. Aloxi is the one that slows the GI track down so I don't get nauseated. It stays with me for at least three days and is the main reason I'm now a true expert on management of constipation. They next started the Cytoxan for about a 40 minute drip. No problems. Then they started the Taxotere and within five minutes I started to cough and felt 'weird'. Sarah my nurse shut off the Taxotere and notified Dr J that I was having a mild reaction to Taxotere. Dr. J recommended more steroids (a different kind) and restarting Taxotere at a slower rate of infusion. That worked and I was able to get through the Taxotere and complete the chemotherapy in 3 1/2 hours. I was well enough to eat dinner and visit with Dima, Brian, Yanni and Brianna most of the evening. David and I really appreciate their support.

Today, I'm not feeling great but I'm fine. My head is still clear - but that veil of fogginess didn't start immediately last time, so I'm not sure when and if that will return. I'm smarter this time in that I'm have no expectations to write the checks for the house-hold bills and try to work on a publishing a paper the weekend following chemotherapy. That was not a good decision last time.

I will say that my care at CCA is really special. When I say it takes a 'village' to treat a patient, I really mean it. Cyndi provides my pre-chemotherapy work-up, Dr. Stender approves my chemo, Dr. J watches me during the chemotherapy, Drs. Burdakin, Huben and Zakalik all maintain a watchful eye - each providing me with their cell phone numbers. I feel fortunate in my care.

I've worked everyday and not missed a beat but the price to pay is I'm tired all evening. I was quick to tears most of the first couple of weeks following the first chemotherapy. I could have a 'pity party' pretty darn quickly - usually when I was driving alone in the car. I use distraction a lot to not think about it. Even when I wrote above how I only have two more treatments remaining. It's not like I really think that's good - I think holy s**t, two more treatments, can I do it?!!! Any treatment after the first is harder because there is no naivete about it. I know what to expect and frankly that doesn't make it any easier. There is no 'pill' to take that reality away.

All is all I'm fine and so appreciate of all your support and prayers.

Love,
Veronica