Day 4 post chemo #3

Dear Family and Friends,

I did end up going home early from work yesterday and thought that just being home would help me feel better. It didn't. The afternoon was long and lonely. It's day 4 now and I'm awake. I forced myself to eat some toast and drink coffee. I still don't feel well but I'm better, so I'm going to make the effort to go to work. I can't stand being home feeling sick. My stomach is bloaty and my brain somewhat foggy. I go in and out of feeling nauseous - but not enough to want to take an anti-nausea pill which would then contribute to the constipation. Taking medications is always a trade off. David said that sometimes patients on the same chemotherapy program as me will complain that the first treatment was the worse - the next will say the second or third treatment is worse. It varies. Apparently for me - its the 3rd treatment that's the worst. I'm thinking maybe I didn't go into this treatment as 'healthy' as the others, since the hospitalization last week. Maybe I just wasn't as strong. I hate being so self-absorbed. I have things to do that have nothing to do with me and this cancer treatment. I'm sick of being sick!

Love, Veronica